How to Navigate Co-Parenting Amidst Anger and Hurt

Co-parenting after a divorce or separation is rarely easy, and it becomes even more challenging when feelings of anger, resentment, or distrust between parents linger. Learning how to navigate co-parenting in a productive and child-focused way is essential for fostering a healthy environment for your kids. In this article, we will explore strategies to move past hurt and anger to create a successful co-parenting dynamic, with ideas recommended by the Council for Relationships.

Why Co-Parenting Can Be Challenging

Co-parenting is all about collaboration. It requires you to put aside your personal feelings and make joint decisions that are in the best interests of your children. Below are best practices for setting negative emotions aside and putting the needs of the children as top priority.

  • Stay Focused on the Kids

One of the most important strategies for successful co-parenting is to remain child-focused. Regardless of how much animosity exists between you and your co-parent, your children should always be your priority. When emotions flare up, take a step back and ask yourself, “How will my response affect my children?” This simple question can help you reframe the situation and approach co-parenting with a calmer, more rational mindset.

  • Effective Communication: Keeping It Respectful and Clear

One of the biggest challenges in co-parenting is maintaining open and respectful communication. Focus on using respectful, neutral language when discussing anything related to the children. If in-person conversations become too heated, you can consider switching to email or text messages, which can provide a helpful buffer. For those struggling to let go of past hurt, a Reddit user shared their perspective on how to move past anger and lack of trust in co-parenting, emphasizing the importance of forgiveness and emotional detachment. This approach can help to depersonalize interactions with your co-parent, allowing you to focus solely on what matters most—your children.

  • Avoid Using Children as Messengers

One of the biggest mistakes co-parents can make is using their children as messengers or intermediaries. Asking your child to relay messages to your co-parent, especially if the message involves tension or unresolved issues, can put an unnecessary burden on your child and cause confusion. It’s important to establish a direct line of communication with your co-parent, even if it’s challenging, to avoid involving your children in adult conflicts.

  • Seek Inspiration from Other Successful Co-parents

Seek out friends, family or even famous examples of co-parenting success to inspire yourself to greatness. Co-parents Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green are an example of celebrity co-parents who successfully navigate this aspect of their relationship. Despite having a public and sometimes rocky split, they’ve made a point to prioritize their children and avoid putting them in the middle of their differences. As described in a Grazia Daily article, the couple appears to have put aside personal differences to ensure their children grow up with the love and support of both parents.

  • Give Yourself Time and Space to Heal

Co-parenting while harboring hurt or anger can take a toll on your mental health. It’s important to acknowledge your emotions and give yourself time to heal. This might involve seeking support from a therapist, counselor, or support group to process the emotions associated with the breakup and the new dynamics of co-parenting.

  • Focus on the Bigger Picture

At the end of the day, the goal of co-parenting is to ensure that your child feels loved, supported, and secure. Letting go of personal resentment and focusing on the bigger picture—the healthy upbringing of your child—can help guide you through the difficulties of co-parenting. With time, patience, and a child-centered approach, many parents find that their co-parenting relationship improves, even if it wasn’t easy at first.

Consult the Law Office of David Knecht

Co-parenting isn’t about being friends with your ex—it’s about being the best possible parents for your children. If you are considering divorce or in the process, reach out to the experienced attorneys at David Knecht Law. We have years of experience in divorce law and other family law cases and can help set you up for co-parenting success. Contact us today at (707) 451-4502. Our experienced team is ready to assist you.

Filed Under: Divorce Attorney, Divorce Lawyer, Divorce Planning, Family Law

Are Holographic Wills Valid in California?

A question that many aging adults have is whether a handwritten will is legally enforceable in California. This type of will is known as a holographic will, which is a written document written by hand (not typed on an electronic device device) without witnesses. This article delves into the legal analysis of holographic wills in California, providing an in-depth look at the relevant laws and a notable case, Newman v. Casey, which sheds light on this topic.

Legal Framework for Holographic Wills in California

In California, holographic wills are indeed recognized as valid under certain conditions, as outlined in California Probate Code § 6111. To be considered valid, a holographic will must meet the following criteria:

  • Handwritten and Signed by the Testator: The entire will or the material provisions must be in the handwriting of the testator. Additionally, the testator must sign the document.
  • Intent: The will must clearly indicate that the document is intended to serve as the testator’s will.
  • Date: While not strictly necessary, including the date is advisable. An undated holographic will can present complications if there is a question about its timing relative to other wills.

These requirements make holographic wills a viable option for individuals who prefer a simple and informal way of expressing their final wishes. However, due to the lack of formality, holographic wills can lead to disputes and legal challenges, particularly if the language is ambiguous. In California, while there is no strict limit on the situations in which a holographic will can be valid, it is essential that the document meets the fundamental requirements of handwriting, signature, and intent to be recognized by the court.

Newman v. Casey: A Landmark Case

Newman v. Casey, the landmark case involving holographic wills, was decided by the California Court of Appeal in 1995 and provides precedent regarding the validity of holographic wills. In this case, the court examined the holographic will of Jere P. Casey, which was contested by Patricia Newman and others.

Facts of the Case: Jere P. Casey wrote a holographic will that left his estate to his partner, Patricia Newman, and others. The will was handwritten, signed by Casey, and included material provisions that specified the distribution of his assets. However, the will lacked a date, leading to a dispute over its validity.

Court’s Decision: The court upheld the validity of Casey’s holographic will. It emphasized that while the absence of a date could complicate matters, it did not invalidate the will as long as the document clearly demonstrated the testator’s intent and was signed by the testator. The court found that Casey’s handwritten document met the essential requirements under California law.

Implications: The ruling in Newman v. Casey reaffirmed that the core elements of a holographic will—handwriting, signature, and clear intent—are paramount. It also highlighted that while the absence of a date may complicate matters, it does not necessarily render the will invalid unless there are competing wills or other disputes about timing.

Consult the Law Office of David Knecht

Even though a holographic will is a simple solution, there are typically limitations and weaknesses of a holographic will that make them less effective for estate planning than other more formal tools. Consulting with an experienced estate planning firm, such as the Law Office of David Knecht, can help address potential issues and ensure that your will meets all legal requirements. Seeking legal counsel is particularly important to minimize the risk of disputes and ensure clarity in the document. Contact us today at (707) 451-4502. Our experienced team is ready to assist you.

Filed Under: California Estate Plan, Estate Planning, Fairfield Attorney, Fairfield Lawyer, General

Navigating Custody When Your Child Is Neurodivergent

Co-parenting after a divorce is challenging under any circumstances, but it becomes even more complex when a child is neurodivergent. The definition of neurodivergent from merriam-webster.com is a term used to describe individuals whose brain function differs from what is considered typical. Neurodivergent children—those with conditions like autism, ADHD, sensory processing disorders, or other developmental differences—often require a specialized parenting approach.

This article explores some of the common challenges parents face, strategies that can help make shared custody work, and important considerations when raising a neurodivergent child in two homes with suggestions originally published in a psychologytoday.com article about navigating shared custody with a neurodivergent child. Understanding how to navigate shared custody in a way that prioritizes the well-being of neurodivergent children is crucial for co-parenting success.

Understanding the Challenges of Shared Custody for Neurodivergent Children

  • Create structure and routine: Neurodivergent children often thrive on structure and routine. Transitions between two homes, particularly when those environments are different, can cause stress or confusion. Neurodivergent children may have specific needs related to sensory input, communication, or emotional regulation, which must be considered when designing a custody plan. Frequent changes in environment, inconsistent schedules, or differing parenting styles between households can exacerbate stress and anxiety for these children.
  • Avoid plans that involve frequent transitions. Transitions like alternating weeks or mid-week switches—may not be suitable for neurodivergent children. These transitions can cause emotional dysregulation, as these children often struggle with changes in routine.

Tailoring Plans to Neurodivergent Children

When creating a custody plan, consider the following strategies to support the needs of your neurodivergent child:

  • Consistency Between Homes. Consistency is essential for neurodivergent children. Maintaining the same daily routine in both homes—such as mealtimes, bedtime, and therapy schedules—can reduce stress. A parenting plan that outlines these routines to ensure both parents are on the same page can help minimize confusion for the child.

Co-parenting Communication

  • Clear and Regular Communication.

Both parents need to be informed about the child’s daily activities, progress in school or therapy, and any behavioral or emotional changes. Consistent communication ensures that the child receives the same support, regardless of which parent they are with. Using a shared online calendar or app specifically designed for co-parenting can help parents stay on the same page about appointments, therapy sessions, and medications.

Managing Therapy and Special Needs

  • Coordinating Therapies.

Neurodivergent children often require specialized therapy, such as speech therapy, occupational therapy, or behavioral therapy. It is crucial to have clear agreements about who will handle therapy appointments and how both parents can continue supporting the child’s progress across both homes. Additionally, behavioral therapy often involves routines and exercises that need to be consistently implemented. Parents should work together to ensure that both homes are equipped to support the child’s therapy, whether that involves certain tools, exercises, or routines.

Education and School Support

  • Take advantage of school resources.

For many neurodivergent children, school is a critical part of their support system. These children may have individualized education programs (IEPs) or 504 plans that provide accommodations to help them succeed. Parents should attend school meetings together when possible and agree on how to address any issues related to the child’s education.

Additional Tips for Raising a Neurodivergent Child

Contact an Experienced Divorce Attorney

Co-parenting a neurodivergent child presents specific challenges that require careful consideration and collaboration. At the Law Office of David Knecht, we prioritize you and your family. We have extensive experience in divorce and want to help you achieve the best parenting plan for your children. Contact us today at (707) 451-4502. Our experienced team is ready to assist you.

Filed Under: Divorce Lawyer, Family Law, General, General Legal Advice, Vacaville Attorney, Vacaville Lawyer

Warren Buffett’s Estate Plan: Key Takeaways for Effective Wealth Transfer

Warren Buffett, one of the most successful investors of all time, is not only known for his business acumen but also for his carefully planned estate strategy. Buffett has consistently emphasized philanthropy, efficient wealth transfer, and minimizing taxes, which serve as key pillars of his estate plan. While his fortune is massive, the principles behind his estate planning strategies can provide valuable lessons for anyone looking to efficiently transfer wealth to future generations while supporting charitable causes.

Here are the key takeaways from Warren Buffett’s estate plan and what individuals can learn to apply in their own estate planning strategies:

Buffett’s “Death Plan” to Dodge Taxation

  • Minimizing Taxes: One of the most notable elements of Buffett’s estate plan is his focus on reducing the tax burden on his estate. A Yahoo Finance article reveals that Buffett intends to donate over 99% of his wealth to charity, significantly minimizing the estate tax impact.
  • Charitable Giving as a Tax Strategy: By directing his wealth toward charitable causes, Buffett not only benefits society but also reduces the taxable portion of his estate. For individuals with smaller estates, strategies such as charitable remainder trusts (CRTs) and setting up family foundations can serve a similar purpose—supporting causes while reducing tax liabilities.

Generational Wealth and Family Control

  • Trusting the Right People: Buffett has ensured that his three children will manage portions of his estate through charitable foundations, as highlighted in a CNBC article. By empowering his children to oversee specific aspects of his wealth, Buffett ensures that his legacy aligns with his long-term goals.
  • Choosing Executors and Trustees: One of the critical lessons from Buffett’s approach is the importance of selecting trusted individuals to manage your estate. This ensures that wealth is handled responsibly, according to the testator’s wishes. Even for smaller estates, choosing a trustworthy executor or trustee is vital to ensure that your wealth is passed down efficiently and according to your plans.

Philanthropy and Legacy

  • Leaving a Legacy: In a thought-provoking article from The Blum Firm, Buffett’s estate philosophy reflects his belief that wealth should serve a greater purpose. His plan to give away most of his fortune, while still leaving his children with enough to manage charitable foundations, showcases his commitment to leaving a legacy of philanthropy and responsible wealth management.
  • Aligning Your Estate with Your Values: You don’t need to be a billionaire to leave a lasting legacy. Smaller estates can still have a significant impact through thoughtful philanthropy. Consider how a portion of your estate could support causes important to you—whether through a local charity, scholarship fund, or community project.

Practical Estate Planning Lessons from Buffett’s Approach

  • Charitable Giving for Tax Reduction: Incorporating charitable donations into your estate plan can help reduce the taxable portion of your estate while supporting causes you care about.
  • Select the Right Executors or Trustees: It’s crucial to choose trusted individuals to manage your estate after your passing. These individuals will ensure that your wealth is distributed according to your wishes and that your estate is handled efficiently.
  • Plan for Your Legacy: Consider how your wealth will impact your loved ones and your community. Like Buffett, your estate can reflect your values and goals, whether through donations to charity or establishing family foundations.
  • Provide Clear Instructions: Make sure your estate planning documents are detailed and leave no room for confusion. Specify how your assets should be distributed, who should oversee the estate, and how charitable donations or foundations should be managed.

Consult the Law Office of David Knecht

Whether you are interested in preserving your wealth for your heirs or making a lasting impact through philanthropy, our experienced team can help you create a plan that reflects your values and goals. At David Knecht Law, we are here to guide you through this process and help you create a legacy that aligns with your vision for the future. We understand that estate planning is a deeply personal process, and we are committed to helping our clients navigate the complexities of the estate planning process. Contact us today at (707) 451-4502. Our experienced team is ready to assist you.

Filed Under: California Estate Plan, Digital Estate Plan, Estate Planning, Estates, Living Will, Power of Attorney, Trust Administration Attorney , Vacaville Attorney, Vacaville Lawyer

Co-parent Drop-off Tips

Many aspects of co-parenting can be a challenge, and one that frequently presents is drop-offs and pick-ups. Emotionally charged co-parenting drop-offs can be one of the most difficult aspects of shared custody arrangements, often bringing emotional stress for both parents and children. Successfully navigating these transitions to reduce the stress on your children will benefit everyone involved.  This article will summarize helpful coparent drop-off tips suggested by TheEveryMom.com.

  • Establish a Consistent Routine: A regular drop-off and pick-up schedule helps children know what to expect, reducing anxiety. Consistency is especially important for young children, who thrive on predictability. When creating a routine, consider your child’s school and extracurricular schedules. Sticking to the agreed-upon times and communicating any necessary changes in advance shows respect and fosters a stable environment for the child.
  • Keep Communication Open and Focused: Effective communication between co-parents is crucial for managing the logistics of shared custody. Whether you prefer texting, emailing, or using a shared calendar app, the key is to keep the communication focused on the child’s needs and logistics. Avoid discussing contentious issues during drop-offs, as this can create a tense environment that negatively impacts the child. By keeping the conversations child-centered, both parents can maintain a positive co-parenting relationship. 
  • Choose Neutral Drop-Off Locations: Selecting a neutral, comfortable location for drop-offs can help minimize potential tension. This might be a public place like a park, a mutual friend’s house, or another familiar spot where both parents and children feel safe. Avoid locations that might trigger emotional reactions or past conflicts, as the goal is to create a calm and peaceful transition for the child.
  • Be Punctual and Prepared: Punctuality is not only a sign of respect but also essential for maintaining your child’s routine. Arriving on time for drop-offs and pick-ups helps prevent unnecessary stress and disruptions. Additionally, ensure your child is prepared with everything they need for their time with the other parent, such as clothes, school supplies, and any necessary medications. Being organized and on time helps foster a sense of security and trust between all parties.
  • Stay Positive and Supportive: Your attitude during drop-offs can significantly influence your child’s experience. Even if you’re feeling stressed or emotional, it’s important to remain positive and supportive. Avoid arguing or discussing disputes with your co-parent in front of your child, as children are sensitive to tension and conflict. Demonstrating a positive demeanor during drop-offs can help ease your child’s anxiety and reinforce that they are loved and supported by both parents.
  • Use Drop-Offs as an Opportunity for Connection: Drop-offs can also serve as a moment to connect with your child and offer reassurance. A quick hug, some words of encouragement, or a reminder that they will have fun with the other parent can go a long way in making your child feel secure. Letting your child know that it’s okay to enjoy their time with the other parent helps foster a healthy, balanced relationship with both parents.
  • Plan for the Unexpected: Despite careful planning, unexpected situations can arise. Being flexible and having a backup plan for emergencies or sudden changes in schedules is important. This might involve arranging for a trusted friend or family member to step in if needed. Having a contingency plan helps reduce stress and ensures that things continue to run smoothly, even when unexpected challenges occur.

DAVID KNECHT LAW DIVORCE ATTORNEYS

At David Knecht Law, we understand the challenges of co-parenting and are here to support you through every step of your journey. Whether you need legal advice about divorce, child custody, support, or any other family law issue, our team is here to help you create the best possible outcomes for your family. Contact us today at 707-451-4502 to learn more about how we can assist you.   

 

Filed Under: Divorce Attorney, Divorce Lawyer, Family Law

California Divorce 50/50 Custody Schedules

A 50/50 custody schedule, where parents share equal time with their child, is common in California. A 50/50 custody arrangement can be an ideal solution when both parents live close to one another and can easily coordinate schedules, ensuring the child maintains a stable routine. However, there are cases where couples cannot meaningfully share custody due to the distance between their residences. Co-parenting has become a prevalent reality for millions of parents in the U.S. A study published in Demographic Research discussing coparenting trends reveals that the percentage of divorces resulting in joint custody increased significantly from 13 percent in 1985 to 34 percent in the early 2010s with even more sharing custody today.

This article will focus on custody plans for parents who both live in California and discuss some of the most common 50/50 custody plans. Each of these options offers different benefits and challenges, depending on the child’s age, the parents’ work schedules, and their ability to cooperate.

Understanding Common 50/50 Custody Schedules

  1. 2-2-3 Plan: In this schedule, one parent has the child for two days, the other parent has the child for the next two days, and then the child returns to the first parent for a three-day weekend. The following week, the schedule reverses.
  • This plan works well for younger children who benefit from frequent contact with both parents.
  • It requires parents to live close to each other and maintain consistent communication.
  • It can be challenging for scheduling because one parent will have children on Monday and Tuesday for one week and then Wednesday and Thursday another week.
  1. Alternating Weeks: This plan involves the child spending one full week with one parent, followed by a full week with the other parent.
  • One benefit of this plan is fewer transfers and interactions with the other parent at transfers.
  • This plan provides a stable routine, especially for older children who can handle longer periods away from each parent.
  • However, it might be challenging for younger children who may struggle with not seeing one parent for an entire week.

 

  1. 3-4-4-3 Plan: In this schedule, the child spends three days with one parent, four days with the other parent, and then four days with the first parent, followed by three days with the second parent.
  • This plan balances the time spent with each parent over two weeks, providing more extended periods with each parent while still allowing for regular transitions.
  • This plan can be confusing since it is alternating.

Factors to Consider

Creating a successful 50/50 custody schedule requires careful consideration of several factors:

  • Child’s Age and Needs: Younger children often benefit from shorter, more frequent contact with both parents, while older children might prefer longer periods with each parent to establish routines. Consider the child’s school schedule, extracurricular activities, and any special needs.
  • Parents’ Work Schedules: A 50/50 custody schedule must align with both parents’ work commitments. Flexibility and a willingness to accommodate changes are essential to ensure the schedule works for everyone involved.
  • Parental Cooperation: A key to making any custody schedule work is effective communication between parents. The success of a 50/50 schedule depends on both parents’ ability to cooperate, make joint decisions, and prioritize the child’s well-being over any personal conflicts.
  • Distance Between Parents’ Homes: The closer the parents live to each other, the easier it is to manage a 50/50 custody schedule. Long distances can create logistical challenges, especially when considering the child’s school and social activities.

Legal Considerations

California courts prioritize the child’s best interests when determining custody arrangements. While a 50/50 schedule is common, it must be deemed beneficial for the child. Factors such as each parent’s living situation, the child’s relationship with each parent, and the ability to provide a stable environment all play roles in the court’s decision. Additionally, if parents cannot agree on a custody arrangement, the court may order a custody evaluation to assess the situation. The evaluator’s report can significantly influence the court’s final decision.

Getting Professional Help

Consulting with an experienced family law attorney can assist you navigating the complexities of child custody in a divorce. The attorneys here at the Law Office of David Knecht we are experienced in all aspects of family law and can help you. Contact us today at 707-451-4502.  

Filed Under: Divorce Attorney, Divorce Lawyer, Fairfield Attorney, Fairfield Lawyer, Family Law, Vacaville Attorney, Vacaville Lawyer

Celebrity Estate Planning: To Give or Not to Give?

If you have given your estate plan some thought, you may have pondered whether it is better to leave your estate to your children or to a charitable cause? This is an important consideration for estate planning for many people, and it is definitely a hot topic for celebrity estate planning.

The answer to this question is deeply personal and may involve trying to find the balance between promoting hard work and self-sufficiency in your children, but also allowing future generations to benefit from your dedication and labors. While a few stars, such as Whoopi Goldberg plan to leave their wealth to their children, many of the rich and famous take a different view.

This article will discuss high net worth individuals who are not planning to leave a large inheritance for their children and some of their reasons why, with information from these publications: Us Weekly, E! Online, South China Morning Post, Honey Nine, and BBC News

Celebrities Who Do Not Want to Leave a Large Inheritance

  • Daniel Craig – James Bond actor Daniel Craig is one such celebrity who has made headlines for his unconventional approach to estate planning. Craig has stated, “Isn’t there an old adage that if you die a rich person, you’ve failed?”
  • Mila Kunis & Ashton Kutcher – The couple has stated they don’t plan to create trust funds for their children and believe in teaching the value of hard work.
  • Gordon Ramsay – Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay shares a similar sentiment. Ramsay has been very vocal about not leaving his fortune to his children. He said, “It’s definitely not going to them, and that’s not in a mean way; it’s to not spoil them.” Ramsay believes that his children should work for their own success and not rely on his wealth.
  • Mick Jagger – Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger also plans to leave his children out of his vast estate. Jagger’s approach is part of a broader trend among some of the world’s richest individuals who believe that substantial inheritances can stifle ambition and drive.
  • Elton John – The iconic musician has said he plans to give most of his fortune to charity rather than his children.
  • Sting – The renowned musician has indicated that his children will not receive his wealth, emphasizing self-reliance.
  • Simon Cowell – The TV personality and producer has stated that he intends to donate his fortune to charity rather than leaving it to his son.
  • Mark Zuckerberg – The Facebook founder and his wife, Priscilla Chan, have pledged to give away 99% of their wealth during their lifetimes.
  • George Lucas – The “Star Wars” creator has committed to donating much of his wealth to education and philanthropy.
  • Warren Buffett – The billionaire investor has long been an advocate for giving away the majority of his wealth to charitable causes.
  • Jackie Chan – Martial arts legend Jackie Chan is known for his charitable endeavors and has announced that he will donate his entire fortune to charity, rather than leaving it to his son. Chan believes that his son should earn his own way, just as he did.
  • Bill Gates – While not a Hollywood star, Bill Gates‘ approach to estate planning has influenced many in the entertainment industry. Gates has pledged to leave a small portion of his wealth to his children, with the majority going to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. Gates believes that giving his children a vast sum of money would not be beneficial for them in the long run.

Estate planning in Hollywood showcases a wide array of philosophies. The attorneys here at the Law Office of David Knecht, we can help identify your priorities and establish or update an estate plan that will carry out your wishes. Whether you are looking to create a new will or trust, or need to make changes to existing documents, our experienced team is ready to assist. Contact us today at 707-451-4502.  

 

Filed Under: California Estate Plan, Trust Administration Attorney , Vacaville Attorney, Vacaville Lawyer

What do your kids want to inherit?

Are you wondering what your kids want to inherit from you? The answer may surprise you. A recent study on the inheritance expectations of Millennials and Gen Z reveals insights into the hopes and expectations of the next generations.

Key Findings:

  • Inheritance Expectations: A notable 68% of millennials and Gen Z members anticipate receiving an inheritance or have already received one.
  • Average Inheritance Value: On average, these inheritors expect to receive around $320,000.
  • Saving and Investment Plans: Among those receiving an inheritance, 76% plan to either save or invest the money.
  • Debt Repayment Goals: Approximately 40% plan to use their inheritance to pay off debt, with 69% of those carrying over $10,000 in debt hoping their inheritance will cover it.
  • Charitable Giving: A vast majority (92%) of those expecting an inheritance do not intend to donate any part of it.
  • Parental Support: One-third of respondents either already support or expect to financially support their parents.
  • Views on Wealth Transfer: Over half believe that the upcoming wealth transfer could exacerbate economic inequality.

What Millennials Value

According to an AARP article, Millennials place a high value on family heirlooms that carry sentimental value, particularly:

  • Personal letters
  • Cookbooks with family recipes
  • Jewelry with sentimental value
  • Furniture with family history
  • Artwork created by family members
  • Tools or items related to family traditions
  • War memorabilia or items of historical significance
  • Handcrafted items or DIY projects from ancestors
  • Vintage toys or games shared during childhood

What Millennials Don’t Want

An article from The Desert Sun highlights several items that Millennials typically do not want, including:

  • Large furniture
  • Formal dinnerware
  • Antiques
  • Silverware sets
  • Heavy cabinets
  • Bulky dining room sets
  • Fine China
  • Ornate rugs
  • Collectibles with no personal significance
  • Outdated electronics or gadgets

The Importance of Communication

Given these shifting preferences, it is crucial for Baby Boomers to have open and honest conversations with their children about inheritance. An article from Elder Law Answers emphasizes the importance of these discussions, with best practices for facilitating communication:

  • Start Early: Initiating these conversations sooner rather than later allows for ample time to address any concerns and make necessary adjustments to the estate plan.
  • Be Transparent: Clearly explain the reasoning behind your decisions, particularly if they diverge from traditional expectations. Transparency helps build trust and understanding.
  • Listen: Give your children the opportunity to express their preferences and concerns. Understanding their perspective can help in making decisions that are respectful of their wishes.
  • Involve a Professional: An estate planning attorney can provide valuable guidance and help mediate these conversations, ensuring that all legal aspects are properly addressed.

Contact a California Attorney Experiences with Estate Plannin

Estate planning can be very personal and individualized, with a focus on what will make your beneficiaries happy. We want to help you accomplish the estate planning goals that are right for your loved ones. For personalized legal advice on estate planning, visit www.davidknechtlaw.com or call us today at (707) 451-4502.

Filed Under: California Estate Plan, Living Trust , Probate Lawyer, Trust Administration Attorney , Vacaville Attorney, Vacaville Lawyer

Should You Ask for Spousal Support?

“Flip or Flop” star Christina Haack and Joshua Hall each filed for divorce Tuesday in an Orange County court. Joshua requested spousal support (also known as alimony) and asked to terminate the court’s ability to award support to Christina, while Christina’s petition requested the court to terminate support for both parties. This case raises the question that faces many California divorce clients: Should you ask for spousal support?

This article will help you answer that question for yourself by providing an overview of spousal support based on information from Forbes’ guide on California alimony and the California Family Code Section 4320 and California Courts Self-Help Guide.

Types of Spousal Support

California recognizes two main types of spousal support:

  1. Temporary Spousal Support: This type of support is awarded during the divorce proceedings to help the lower-earning spouse maintain financial stability until the final divorce decree. The primary aim is to preserve the status quo during the litigation process.
  2. Permanent Spousal Support: Despite its name, this support is not necessarily lifelong. It is awarded once the divorce is finalized and is based on a variety of factors aimed at ensuring fairness and financial balance post-divorce.

Determining Spousal Support

The determination of spousal support in California is influenced by several factors, as outlined in California Family Code Section 4320. These factors help ensure a fair and equitable support arrangement:

  • Length of the Marriage: Generally, the duration of the marriage plays a significant role in determining the length and amount of support. Marriages lasting ten years or more are often considered “long-term,” which can lead to longer support durations.
  • Standard of Living: The court aims to ensure that both parties can maintain a lifestyle similar to what they enjoyed during the marriage. This involves assessing the standard of living established during the union.
  • Earning Capacity and Job Market: The court evaluates the earning capacity of both spouses, including their marketable skills, job market conditions, and any need for additional education or training.
  • Age and Health: The age and health of both parties are crucial factors, as these can impact their ability to earn an income and meet their financial needs.
  • Contributions to the Marriage: Non-economic contributions, such as homemaking and supporting the other spouse’s career or education, are considered when determining support.
  • Financial Needs and Obligations: The financial obligations and needs of both spouses, including debts and assets, are taken into account to ensure a balanced support arrangement.

Duration of Spousal Support

The duration of spousal support in California varies. For marriages lasting less than ten years, support typically lasts for half the length of the marriage. For longer marriages, the court has more discretion and may award support for a longer period. The goal is to provide the lower-earning spouse with enough time to become self-sufficient.

Modifications and Termination

Spousal support orders are not set in stone and can be modified if there is a significant change in circumstances, such as a change in income, employment status, or financial needs. Spousal support typically ends upon the remarriage of the recipient or the death of either party. Additionally, cohabitation with a new partner can also impact the support arrangement.

Retain an Experienced Family Law Attorney

At the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience in all aspects of California family law and can help you decide whether to seek spousal support in your divorce. We focus on serving clients in Solano, Napa and Yolo. Contact us today at 707-451-4502. For more information and assistance with spousal support and other family law matters, visit DavidKnechtLaw.com.

Filed Under: Divorce Attorney, Divorce Lawyer, Divorce Planning

How to Bring Up a Prenup Without Sounding Like a Jerk

Bringing up a prenuptial agreement can be a sensitive topic for many couples, but this article will discuss suggestions on how to approach this difficult conversation, with ideas originally published in a HuffPost article entitled, “How to Bring Up a Prenup without Sounding Like a Jerk.”

A prenuptial agreement, or prenup, is a legal document that outlines how a couple’s assets will be divided in the event of a divorce and a postnuptial agreement is the same, but agreed to after marriage. Why would you want to bring up a prenup or postnup? According to a CDC report, over a 10-year period, 43% of marriages end in divorce, so understanding your financial risks and liabilities in advance of divorce can be very helpful to streamline the divorce process later on.

Timing is Everything

When bringing up a prenup, timing is crucial. Avoid discussing it during high-stress moments or when you’re in a heated argument. Choose a calm, private setting where both of you can talk openly without distractions. According to HuffPost, it’s best to start this conversation well before the wedding planning begins, giving both partners ample time to consider and discuss the agreement.

Frame it as a Joint Decision

Presenting the prenup as a mutual decision rather than a one-sided demand can help ease tension. Emphasize that a prenup is a way for both of you to protect your individual interests and the financial health of your marriage. For instance, you might say, “I think it would be good for us to talk about a prenup to make sure we’re both protected and clear on our financial expectations.”

Focus on the Positive

Highlight the benefits of having a prenup. Explain how it can provide peace of mind and prevent future conflicts. Mention that it’s not about mistrust but about being proactive and responsible. The California Department of Financial Protection and Innovation suggests discussing financial matters openly as part of healthy relationship practices.

Be Honest and Transparent

Transparency is key when discussing a prenup. Share your reasons for wanting one and listen to your partner’s concerns. Avoid using ultimatums or making it seem like the prenup is non-negotiable. Instead, approach the conversation with empathy and a willingness to compromise.

Seek Professional Advice Together

Consider consulting with a financial advisor or attorney together. This can help ensure that both partners understand the legal aspects of the prenup and feel that their interests are being fairly represented. It also demonstrates that you’re taking a collaborative approach to the agreement.

Use Real-Life Examples

Sometimes, real-life examples can help illustrate the importance of a prenup. Share stories of friends or family members who have benefited from having one or faced difficulties because they didn’t. This can make the concept more relatable and less intimidating.

Reassure Your Commitment

Reiterate your commitment to your partner and the relationship. Make it clear that the prenup is not about doubting the marriage’s success but about protecting both of you in the future. Assure your partner that you’re in this together, and the prenup is just one part of a broader conversation about your future.

Follow Up

After the initial conversation, give your partner time to process the information. Follow up later to see how they’re feeling and to address any further questions or concerns. This ongoing dialogue can help build trust and ensure that both partners are comfortable with the decision.

Contact a California Family Lawyer

Bringing up a prenup is difficult, but with planning and consideration for each other, you can discuss a prenuptial agreement in a way that respects and values both partners’ perspectives. At the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience in all aspects of family law, and we focus on serving clients in Solano, Napa and Yolo. Contact us today at 707-451-4502.

Filed Under: Divorce Attorney, Divorce Lawyer, Divorce Planning, General
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