For many, divorce is a challenge. You may worry about your children and your future. An opinion piece published by the New York Times presents a different paradigm. From the perspective of the author, divorce for some can be a liberating, refreshing change that propels you to a better present and future. This article will summarize the opinion, Divorce can Be an Act of Radical Self-Love, which can be found here: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/09/30/opinion/divorce-children.html
- “Everything is my choice, and I am in charge.”
The experience of one newly single mother who works full time and attends graduate school at night was highlighted in the New York Times piece. She said she enjoyed choosing her apartment, decorating it and paying for it. Her quote was, “everything is my choice, and I am in charge.” The ability to make choices independently is an oft overlooked benefit of divorce.
- Children may benefit from being released from a toxic environment.
Many divorcing parents worry how their children may react, but the author of the NY Times opinion piece posits that children may benefit from being released from a toxic environment. She writes: “Children know on an intuitive level what their parents are thinking and feeling. Long frosty silences, screaming matches and unrelenting tension between parents can inflict damage on the well-being of their children.”
For research that examines the way in which predivorce marital conflict influences the impact of divorce on children, see https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2001.00197.x
See also research on whether children benefit when high-conflict marriages are dissolved , which can be found here. https://www.jstor.org/stable/353565
- Freedom from a relationship that “crushes the spirit.”
Personal development can flourish post-divorce with the newfound freedom from a relationship that “crushes the spirit.”
Research cited in an article on connectedwomen.co supports the idea that you may be happier divorced than married. https://www.connectedwomen.co/magazine/the-brighter-side-of-single-mom-life-why-more-women-are-living-happily-ever-after-divorce/
- A survey conducted in the US by research firm Avvo found 75% of divorced women reported they had no regrets ending their marriage compared to 61% of divorced men
- A UK study by Kingston University surveyed 10,000 divorced men and women between ages 16 and 60; participants were asked to rate their happiness before and after their divorce, and again the women were found to be much happier for up to five years following the end of their marriages
- The UK study also found that divorced women reported feeling more content than they had in their entire lifetimes; the findings also indicated women were more likely to seek the support of friends, improve their health and lifestyle, seek out new experiences, and discover more about themselves.
Consult with Experienced Divorce Attorneys at the Law Office of David Knecht
If you are considering whether divorce might be the right decision for you, get experienced legal advice. At the Law Office of David Knecht we have extensive experience with family law in California and can help you successfully navigate a California divorce. Contact us at 707-451-4502 for more information.
