Divorce Planning Archives - Page 2 of 2

5 Secrets for Coping with Divorce Stress and Depression

If you are struggling coping with divorce stress or depression, you are not alone. In fact, a study cited in the Journal of Family Therapy reports that despite the increased frequency of divorce in our society, a divorce event can result in emotional and economic hardship for many and a greatly increased depressive effect. https://www.jstor.org/stable/352399

This article will suggest a few strategies to help you be successful in managing the changing life circumstances associated with divorce and help you maintain a positive mental and emotional outlook:

Take each day at a time.

During the divorce process, you can experience a sense of uncertainty or fear about the unknown. You may no be sure what things or going to change or whether you will like your “new normal.” One strategy for managing these concerns is to focus on the short-term rather than the long term: making lists, setting daily goals, and keeping your focus on being successful each day will help you stay positive during this transition.

Confide in a friend.

An interesting 2012 study found that friendships with individuals and couples tend to shift during divorce. See https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10502556.2012.682894.

This study found that friendships with couples tended to distance during divorce and friendships with individuals often strengthened. The implications of this for you may be that you could benefit from strengthening bonds with friends who will be sympathetic and loyal to you. You will need someone you trust to vent to and confide in, and a friend who can provide supportive and positive feedback will help keep you mentally strong.

Let go of the past, release yourself from guilt.

At the end of a relationship, many are drawn in to examining the beginning of the marriage, considering what “red flags” they may have ignored or what went wrong in the process that led up to the marriage. While self-reflection can be healing at the right time and the right circumstances, some may caught in a downward spiral of “would have’s” and “should have’s” about a past that cannot be changed. A helpful technique can be to let go of the past, release yourself from the guilt, and focus on the future rather than dwell on mistakes of the past.

Take time for self-care.

For some, self-care is keeping the routine at the gym, for others it’s the solace of comfort food and a good movie. Regardless of where or how you find solace, it’s important to make time to focus on yourself. Some people become so concerned about their children or others who might be impacted by the divorce that they neglect to put time and effort into making themselves happy.

Find the right lawyer for you.

An experienced and compassionate attorney will help make the divorce process easier for you. Find an attorney who fits your needs. As a client, you are in the driver’s seat on who to hire and how to guide them to effectively communicate and work for you, so do not be afraid to find a person who fits your needs and to help them know the best way to work for your good.

Consult with the Law Office of David Knecht

At the Law Office of David Knecht, at 707-451-4502, we have extensive experience in divorce in California. We can help ease the burden of stress or depression from you by guiding you through the legal process and supporting your goals.

Can I “Kick Out” My Husband or Wife from the Home?

Unfortunately, some relationships involve violence or threatened violence, the question arises whether the victim can legally get the offending spouse “kicked out” of the home. The answer is yes, under certain circumstances. This article will discuss the process in more detail.

Authority for the Court to Remove a Spouse from the Home. The Domestic Violence Prevention Act (DVPA) and Family Code § 6340, 6321, and 6324 authorize a court to order the restrained party to move out of property and allow the protected party to use and possess the property under specific circumstances. To read these code sections, click the following links:

What Facts Need to Be Presented in Hearing. There are three facts that need to be presented at a hearing:
That the person staying has a reason to be in the home, specifically, “Facts sufficient for the court to ascertain that the party who will stay in the dwelling has a right under color of law to possession of the premises.”
That assault or threat of assault is involved, specifically, “That the party to be excluded has assaulted or threatens to assault the other party or any other person under the care, custody and control of the other party, or any minor child of the parties or of the other party.”
Harm, specifically, “That the physical or emotional harm would otherwise result to the other party, to any person under the care, custody and control of the other party, or to any minor child of the parties or of the other party.”

Does the person staying have to be the owner of the home? Not necessarily. This question was presented in a case from the Court of Appeals in California, Nicole G. v. Braithwaite, which can be found here: https://scholar.google.com/scholar_case?case=17446401920668045282&q=braithwaite&hl=en&as_sdt=4,5

In this case, the Court ordered Braithwaite to move out of the property and granted Nicole’s domestic violence restraining order against Braithwaite. In that case, the title to the home was still a civil case and a disputed issue between the parties, but the Court was able to exercise the power to order Braithwaite out and allow Nicole to take possession of the home temporarily to protect her.

Consult with the Law Office of David Knecht

If you have questions about removing a spouse from a home or any questions relating to divorce or family law, please contact the attorneys at the Law Office of David Knecht, at 707-451-4502. We have extensive experience in family law and can be a knowledgeable advocate for you.