Divorce and Depression in California

Divorce can be traumatic and can lead to temporary depression or even clinical severe depression. This article will explain symptoms to look for indicating divorce-related depression and share suggestions on how to move forward and feel better with material sourced from healthline.com.

Divorce Can Be Traumatic, Seeking Help Is Vital

Some statistics put the seriousness of divorce into perspective: A 2015 study of over 13,000 deaths concluded that recent divorce increases the odds of death by suicide by 1.6 times.

If you are dealing with severe depression, whether related to divorce or otherwise, seek professional help. There are many mental health resources with information available.

Signs and Symptoms of Divorce-Related Depression

What are some of the signs of divorce-related depression?

  • Ignoring responsibilities
  • Avoiding family and friends
  • Performing poorly at work

What are some of the symptoms of divorce-related depression?

  • Crying
  • Loss of appetite
  • Loss of interest in hobbies
  • Trouble sleeping
  • Irritability
  • Fatigue
  • Difficulty concentrating

Suicidal thoughts (if you are having suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

What are some suggestions for alleviating divorce-related depression?

  • Seek professional counseling
  • Write in a journal
  • Exercise
  • Focus on eating healthy
  • Pamper yourself
  • Socialize
  • Try to sleep

Contact an Experienced Divorce Firm

You will have many feelings and thoughts to process during and after a divorce because change is never easy for anyone, but remember that you can get through it and find a new normal. Finding the right attorney that can help you may alleviate some of the stress of the divorce process. You will feel more confident with an experienced attorney by your side. For help with any issue relating to divorce or family law, contact the Law Office of David Knecht.  We have extensive experience with family law and can help you feel confident, understood and supported. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 

Estate Planning in California: Unequal Inheritances

For some who are creating an estate plan, a fair distribution may not be an equal distribution. Reasons for this may vary. Perhaps one child is already wealthy while another is needy, perhaps someone in the family is involved in the family business, perhaps certain assets might be more meaningful to one than another. This article will summarize some of the considerations to take into account when creating an estate plan with unequal inheritances, with ideas sourced from https://www.kiplinger.com/retirement/estate-planning-unequal-inheritances-talking-is-key.

Talking to your beneficiaries while you are still alive is key. 

Communication is highly advisable when you have an estate plan with unequal distributions. 

  • Explaining the reasons why you have decided to distribute your estate unequally will go a long way in helping your beneficiaries accept your decisions. 
  • Communication now is more likely to promote family harmony after you are gone.
  • The relationship between risk and reward is a common balancing act in life, so if you explain your assessment of the risks and rewards of each asset to the beneficiaries, it will help then understand the fair approach behind your unequal gift distribution. 

Addressing differences in need. 

There are many strategies for addressing differences in need, and this section will highlight a few approaches. 

  • You may consider involving your beneficiaries in a discussion before you make your decisions on estate planning to get their input as to what they believe is fair. 
  • You may want to pull the wealthy child aside and let him or her know that you will be giving them unequal inheritances, but you hope that they will choose to share it with the more needy siblings. 
  • If you plan on donating to a charity, you may want to prepare your children with a good explanation of why you believe the charity is in more need of the assets than they are. 

Remember that estate plans are not a cure all. 

An estate plan is about wealth transfer, and that is all it can accomplish. 

  • Don’t expect your beneficiaries to change their natures. If you know someone is selfish or hostile or if there is bad blood between family members, you shouldn’t expect that to change just because you are gone. Plan ahead with the personalities you know in mind. 
  • Consider wealth education. If you have substantial assets, you may want to think about what type of wealth education you can provide to your beneficiaries to allow them to effectively utilize the wealth when you are gone. Many estate planning professional will be happy to include your children in discussions about the pros and cons of different estate planning tools, such as trusts, to help them understand and be involved in what will eventually be their future.

Contact an Experienced Estate Planning Attorney

Estate planning involves many important decisions and involving your family members will likely ensure a smoother transition when you are gone. Here are the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience with estate planning and would be happy to educate or involve your beneficiaries as you see fit. We can help you feel confident, understood and supported as you plan for the future. Contact us at 707-451-4502.

Recent Calfiornia Family Law Case Involving Judge’s Bias

This article will review an interesting recent California family law case, Featherstone v. Martinez, a summary of which can be found here. The entirety of the case can be accessed here: 

In this case Featherstone (the court refers to her as “Mother”) was the parent of a child who was under six months old at the time. Mother sought sole primary physical and legal custody on the basis that Father traveled a lot for work and was only in town a few days a month. Mother wanted visitation in her home, for only a few hours and with advance notice. Father wanted overnight visits at least hours and overnight visitation. 

The case becomes interesting with the court’s comments that were later found to be biased. Mother was representing herself and the court made statements such as:  “I know how hard it is. You gave birth to the child. You held the child. You’ve taken care of this child. It’s hard to conceptualize that he is every bit of the parent that you are, especially in this case because he’s been there from birth…so here’s the law: If everything is equal, you’re supposed to be sharing 50/50. Not six hours. 50/50.”

Mother retained an attorney and filed a disqualification motion on the basis of judicial bias. As the litigation proceeded, issues arose where the court took umbrage with Mother’s request to record the Zoom visits between Father and child and the court believed the disqualification motion was untimely and procedurally deficient. The Court sanctioned Mother $10,000 and sanctioned her attorney $10,000. 

The Court of Appeals held that both sanctions were improper. The sanction against the attorney was an error because the code section it was based on does not allow a sanction against a party’s attorney. The sanction against the mother was unwarranted because the court cannot sanction a party for taking litigation positions to which the court disagrees. Further, Mother had a right to believe that the judge was biased and file a motion to seek redress. 

TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS CASE

If you feel the court is biased, you have a right to make the appropriate motion. 

An attorney cannot be sanctioned with the legal basis of Section 271 

  • Quote from the case: “Section 271 provides that a family court may impose an award of attorney fees and costs `in the nature of a sanction’ where the conduct of a party or attorney `frustrates the policy of the law to promote settlement of litigation and, where possible, to reduce the cost of litigation by encouraging cooperation between the parties and attorneys.”

Mother appeared at first hearing unrepresented and perhaps may have had a better outcome had she been represented from the start of the case. 

  • Part of the basis for the improper sanction was that Mother’s disqualification motion was untimely. She waited until she had an attorney and then there was a delay in the attorney receiving the transcript.
  • In some cases, having counsel from the beginning can help you prepare the case properly from the onset of the litigation, rather than having to fix problems later.  

Contact an Experienced Family Law Firm

At the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience in family law. Whether your divorce case is at the beginning, or whether you have tried another firm without success or whether your case has been going for years, we are here to help. We will leverage our many years of experience to provide you with knowledgeable and passionate representation. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 

Estate Planning Lessons from Hollywood: New Developments in the Lisa Marie Presley Case

A widely publicized estate planning case that is ongoing is the disputed estate of Lisa Marie Presley. As reported in the New York Times, Lisa Marie Presley (daughter of Elvis Presley), who was only 54 years old, died suddenly. Within a week Priscilla Presley (Lisa’s mother), went to court to challenge the validity of documents that result in Riley Keough (Lisa’s daughter) is the trustee.  In this article, we provide an update on the news of this case and additional best practice takeaways. Full story here: 

In a previous article, we summarized some basic estate planning principles that can be learned from this high profile case. Namely, 1) detail matter in estate planning, so ensure that documents are accurate, 2) if proper notice is required by the terms of a trust or will, then effectuating that notice is critical, and 3) keeping estate planning documents up to date is important because circumstances can change over time, with deaths, marriages, children born, changes in assets, etc.  

RadarOnline publicized that Riley Keough had changed the locks to the private portion of Graceland that was reserved for family use. The LA Times debunked this rumor by reporting that Graceland reps denied the rumors and issued a statement that read: “No locks at Graceland have been changed since Lisa Marie’s passing.“

A recent development in this case is the Lisa Marie’s ex-husband, Michael Lockwood, is seeking to represent their 14 year old twin daughters in an upcoming hearing for the trust. He asked a judge to appoint him guardian ad litem, giving him authority to speak on behalf of the daughters.

Takeaway Lesson for Estate Planning from this Case

One lesson to be learned from this case is that there are potential estate planning strategy decisions that can be made when setting up a trust. For example, a person may consider whether a family member is the best trustee or whether a neutral non-family member might be a better choice. This case also involves a trust that was changed, and it’s the validity of those changes that are being challenged. Another strategy decision that could be considered for a party that is making a change to a trust would be to revoke the original document and rewrite it with the incorporated changes. 

Contact an Experienced Estate Planning Firm

Another lesson that can certainly be learned from the Lisa Marie Presley dispute is that even for the wealthy, estate planning can have unforeseen pitfalls and challenges. For this reason, finding an experienced law firm to assist you is essential in making sure that your wishes are effectuated after you are gone. At the Law Office of David Knecht, we want to help you create a current and accurate estate plan that will help you achieve your goals. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 

Pros and Cons of a Family Member as a Trustee Part 2

If you are setting up a trust, a key decision is who the right trustee is for your assets and goals. This article is part 2 of a two-part examination about the pros and cons of a family member as trustee and will focus on the advantages of a family member trustee. Each family is different, so this article will review general ideas, but you should consult an experienced estate planning attorney, such as the Law Office of David Knecht, to discuss your specific family, circumstances and estate planning goals. 

Advantages of Family Member Trustee

  • Cost savings.

Professional trustee fees can be expensive if a family member is willing to act as trustee for free. 

  • Family knowledge. 

Having a deep understanding of the family, the personalities, the relationship and the history can be an advantage to a trustee to potentially be able to anticipate problems and foresee challenges to the trust administration. 

  •  Confidence. 

A person doing estate planning may have more confidence in a family member than a professional trustee. Some people feel worried that a professional may not have the empathy for their family or understanding that someone on the inside would have.

Contact an Experienced Estate Planning Firm

If you are considering setting up a trust with a family member as trustee, you may need advice about the pros and cons of the trustee you want. Regardless of your estate planning objectives, an experienced estate planning firm can help you analyze and evaluate your choices.  At the Law Office of David Knecht, we want to help you achieve your estate planning goals. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 

Pros and Cons of a Family Member as a Trustee Part 1

If you are setting up a trust, your choice of who to make the trustee is one of the most important decisions. This article is part 1 of a two-part examination about the pros and cons of a family member as trustee. This will focus on the challenges. The circumstances vary widely for each family, so this article will review general ideas, but you should consult an experienced estate planning attorney, such as the Law Office of David Knecht, to discuss your specific family, circumstances and estate planning goals. This article will summarize information.

Challenges of Family Member Trustee

Fiduciary Duties. 

The family member who serves as the trustee will have important responsibilities. The trustee is managing money for the benefit of someone else, so the law holds the trustee to a higher standard of conduct than someone who is managing their own assets. A fiduciary duty is the duty to act in the best interest and failure to meet those responsibilities can have consequences. 

Inexperience. 

Being a trustee can require financial and legal knowledge and expertise. It can involve managing investments, taking charge of business responsibilities, etc. Depending on the particular trust assets involved, the lack of experience of a family member can potentially be a challenge. 

 Potential personal bias. 

Another challenge for a family member trustee can be a potential personal bias. The family member may have a lot of history, perhaps past conflicts, and personal relationships that may impact their ability to be objective and impartial. Even if the family member is completely objective, you may be subjecting that family member to criticism or conflict with other family members who might want a different result. 

Contact an Experienced Estate Planning Firm

If you are considering setting up a trust with a family member as trustee, you may need advice about how to ameliorate the challenges described in this article. Regardless of your estate planning objectives, an experienced estate planning firm can help you analyze and evaluate your choices.  At the Law Office of David Knecht, we want to help you achieve your estate planning goals. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 

How Should I Tell My School Aged Children About Divorce?

One of the most important and challenging conversations a parent can have with their children is telling them about a divorce. It’s a discussion that will likely always be remembered, so handling this topic is of utmost importance. This article summarizes content from divorcemag.com and provides a checklist for parents to guide them in breaking the news to their children in a positive way. The full article can be found here: 

Affirmation. 

  • Begin by affirming your love for the children and assuring them that you will always be their parent. Tell them that you will always be there for them, but there will be some changes in the family. 

Acknowledge Problems but Don’t Detail Them.

  • Acknowledge that there were problems in the marriage and that you tried to fix them, but do not go into detail about what you think your spouse did wrong. Those are adult issues and too complex and heavy or children, and also you do not want to place your children in a situation where they feel they have to take sides. Be clear with the children that they were in no way at fault and consider apologizing to them for impacting their lives with this new change. 

Consider Your Words. 

  • Consider your children and carefully choose your words. For example, the word “divorce” can be extremely triggering to some children, so you may want to start by calling it a separation. For other children, they may want or need a more direct explanation from you. Make a decision ahead of the conversation about the words you will use. 

Convey Security and Confidence. 

  • Your children need to know that both you and then will be ok. Avoid expressing insecurity about what will happen or how you will get by financially. Try to express confidence and security to your children so that they will feel safe to weather the changes. If one parent is moving out, it is helpful if they already have those arrangements in place so that they can tell the children where they will be and confirm to them that they will still be available and accessible. 

Have the Conversation Together with Your CoParent. 

  • Although emotions may be running high with your coparent, it is often beneficial to work jointly to deliver the message to the children. This can provide confidence to the children that both parents love them and will work together. Emphasize that you will both try to do your best to make the changes as easy on the children as possible. 

Contact an Experienced Family Lawyer

Even if you are just contemplating a divorce, but not certain that you want to go forward, contacting an experienced divorce attorney can be helpful. You can make a plan and know your options. At the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience helping clients with a California divorce, and we are happy to answer your family law questions. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 



Considering Divorce? 3 Things You Need to Know

An article published on Parents.com was authored by a woman who was both a mother and a divorce lawyer and discussed what she wished all clients knew prior to a divorce. This article summarizes the article with a list of 5 things you need to know if you are considering divorce. The article can be found in its entirety here: Understand Your Finances. 

  • Money is clearly and important issue in divorce, yet it is surprising how many people are in the dark about their spouse’s finances. 
  • Find out about your spouse’s income. Are they an employee or independent contractor? Are they contributing to retirement accounts? Do they have other investment properties, stock holdings, or other investments?
  • Figure out your debts. Do you have the credit card bills? Do you know the monthly mortgage amount? Who pays for the car insurance and how much is it? 
  • Although understanding the financial system seems very basic and obvious, many people do not have the documents or online access at their fingertips, and getting this access prior to the divorce will be very beneficial down the road. 

Figure Out Your Monthly Expenses

  • Do you know where your money goes every month? This is often important to know down the road for spousal support. 
  • Try to identify where the money is spent on housing, utilities, health insurance, food, phone services, tv and internet, education, charitable donations, etc. 
  • Organizing your proof of these expenses by having the credit card and bank information at your fingertips will save you time later. 
  • You may have student loans or credit card debts or may plan to incur those during the marriage. 
  • You may inherit money during the marriage. 
  • You may want a safety net against your future spouse’s unhealthy behaviors (money toward addictions, uncontrolled spending, etc. )
  • Be aware of red flags, such as sudden changes in spending habits by one spouse. It is not unusual for a spouse who is considering divorce to try to reduce spending in the months prior or to cancel bills before they come under the court’s scrutiny.  

Many divorces are resolved by settlement, so begin considering your divorce goals.  

  • Most divorces are resolved through a mutually agreed settlement by the parties, so if you are thinking about divorce, it is helpful to analyze your feelings about various settlement possibilities before the divorce even commences. 
  • If you have children, consider their ages, preferences and education. Look realistically at what physical custody you think will be in their best interest. 
  • Decide about assets, such as whether you want to keep possession of the home, whether there are keepsakes that you want to be yours in the divorce, etc. 
  • Try to think long term. A common mistake when parties begin a divorce is short term thinking because it is hard to imagine what life will be like down the road ten years, but the decisions you make with your divorce strategy will have far-reaching consequences. 

Contact an Experienced Family Lawyer

Even if you are just contemplating a divorce, but not certain that you want to go forward, contacting an experienced divorce attorney can be helpful. You can make a plan and know your options. At the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience helping clients with a California divorce, and we are happy to answer your family law questions. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 



Inheritance and Preventing Family Conflicts

As reported by Newsweek.com, a man recently sparked a storm of debate on Reddit when he inherited a property and refused to honor the tradition of hosting family weddings there. This article will summarize some of the suggestions on how to prevent family conflicts with inherited property from the full article, which can be found here:

A study shows asset transfers are of increasing importance for families. 

  • As per an April 2017 study published in Families, Relationships and Societies, “asset transfers are of increasing importance for families as a way of transmitting advantages over generations…but little is known about how inheritance generates disputes, tensions or dissatisfaction among family members.” 
  • See 

Research indicates a continuum of motivations by gifters. 

  •  A study published in the European Journal of Ageing, indicates that material inheritance constitutes a challenge for families and that the motivation of the gifter can fluctuate on a continuum between unconditional donation (altruism) and conditional donation (strategic, reciprocity). 

The person inheriting property should clearly communicate boundaries. 

  • Bill Gladwell, a communication expert, was quoted in the Newsweek article as advising people who inherit property to clearly communicate their boundaries and expectations to family members up front. 
  • Make it clear that any use of inherited property by family members must now be agreed to and approved by the person who now owns it. 
  • Having an open and honest conversation about concerns is vital. 
  • It is important for the new owner of the inherited property to be firm in their boundaries, but it is also imperative to express respect and understanding for the other family members’ feelings to keep the lines of communication open. 

Contact an Experienced Estate Planning Laywer

One aspect of estate planning that is extremely important is thinking ahead to potential family conflicts and creating a plan that will promote the goals of the giver without stirring up disputes in the family. At the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience helping clients with estate planning and can help you make a plan that is just right for you and your loved ones. Contact us at 707-451-4502. 



3 Myths and Misconceptions about Postnuptial Agreements in California

If you are planning to get married, you may be getting advice from family or friends encouraging you to get a “prenup.” A prenuptial agreement is contract entered into prior to marriage that often contains provisions for property and debt division in the event of a divorce. This article addresses some of the common myths and misconceptions regarding prenup agreements.  

  A prenup dooms your marriage. 

  • Asking your loved one to sign a prenup is not very romantic, but often marriage involves challenges where thoughtful planning and communication can trump the romance and assumptions that come in the courtship stage, which is why loving relatives and friends urge couples to keep the romance alive later in the marriage by tackling tough topics before conflicts arise. 
  • Asking for a prenup is not bucking a trend, but rather following it. As reported on mediate.com, 44% of singles think a prenup is a good idea and 15% of divorcing couples wish they had signed a prenup. 

Prenups are expensive to get or are just for rich people

  • Truth is, not matter how much or little money you have, everyone at some level cares about money because it is the way we survive. 
  • You may have student loans or credit card debts or may plan to incur those during the marriage. 
  • You may inherit money during the marriage. 
  • You may want a safety net against your future spouse’s unhealthy behaviors (money toward addictions, uncontrolled spending, etc. )

Prenups are unfair 

  • The most widely publicized prenup cases are often those that are unfair to one spouse, but the norm is to create a balanced and fair agreement that effectuates the goals of both spouses. 
  • Both parties should be represented each by their own lawyer to ensure fairness in the prenup process. 

Contact an Experienced Family Lawyer

Many couples want a simple prenup that doesn’t break the bank and others want a complex contract that deals with significant assets and future income. Regardless of where you fall on the spectrum of cost and complexity, here at the Law Office of David Knecht, we have extensive experience in prenuptial agreements in California and can help you successfully prepare a contract within your budget that meets your goals. Contact us at 707-451-4502.